MELANIE MARQUEZ'S CUTEABLE QUOTES

Ray and Nikki, husband and wife, (minions of mine and soon to become American citizens) e-mailed me yesterday. They admonished me for "improperly posting" the article "MELANIE MARQUEZ'S QUOTABLE QUOTES", saying that if I were to publish an article on a Friendster Bulletin, I should have done it completely and accurately, yada, yada, yada...and then they gave me a longer list of Madame Malaprop's infamous remarks.

*Sigh* I didn't get to tell them that the first list came from them. Sheesh...

Anyway, here is the list they gave to me for you to read and enjoy:

1. "I won't stoop down to my level."
2. "Hello? Bulag ka ba? Bingi ka ba?" (points to ear) "Are you dep?"
3. "'Yung STD, baka sa maruming toilet lang niya nakuha 'yan."
4. "Eh, ikaw ba naman durugin ang ari mo...'pag di ka naman manutok ng baril."
5. "We are lovers, not fighters."
6. "My brother is not a girl, he's a gentleman."
7. "That's why I'm a success. It's because I don't middle in other people's lives."
8. "Don't judge my brother, he's not a book."
9. "Kapatid ko pa rin siya. We are one and the same."
10. "Bakit ang dami mong tanong? You're so questionable."
11. "I don't eat meat. I'm not a carnival."
12. During her acceptance speech at a Metro Manila Film Fest awards night where her bioflick, directed by her late father, Temyong Marquez won an award: "Eto na po ang pinakamaligayang pasko at manigong taon sa inyong lahat."
13. "Sumasakit ang migraine ko."
14. On her father, the late Director Artemio Marquez before he died: "Ang tatay ko ang only living legend na buhay."
15. When asked if her present husband, Adam Lawyer, is her Mr. Right: "Period na talaga, wala nang exclamation point."
16. At a talk show after her break-up with Derek Dee, Melanie was asked if she had some words for Derek's mother, whom she partly blamed for the separation. "Oo nga," Melanie said, "pero, i-English-in ko na para maintindihan niya." She looked into the camera, and with the peremptoriness of royalty said, "And to you, Mrs. Dee, I have two words for you: Ang labo mo!"
17. When asked for a message to her daughter who was allegedly abused by their houseboy: "Don't worry little angel, big angel is here."
18. On what they should do to the houseboy who allegedly molested her daughter: "He should be put behind bar."
19. While waiting backstage during a noontime show after watching Nikki Valdez for her dance number: "Nikki, you're so galing. You should go to the States. You will sell hotcakes!"
20. "You can fool me once, you can fool me twice, you can fool me thrice, but you can never fool me four!"
21. While in 'Morning Girls with Kris & Korina', promoting her movie with Aleck Bovick: "Please watch 'Hiram', starring Aleck Baldwin and myself. It's director by Romy Suzara"
22. "Hindi ba kayo naawa sa kapatid ko...sa mga kuwento niya? Di ba kayo na-persuave ng mga kuwento niya? Hindi si Joey ang tipong mambubugbog ng babae...talaga lang malapit siya sa mga gulo...pro-accident kasi siya eh."
23. Boy Abunda: "O, Melanie, paano na ang showbiz career mo ngayong magmo-Mormon ka na?"
    Melanie: "Ah, okay lang 'yon Boy, kasi matagal na rin akong semi-retarded."
24. Boy: "Melanie, anong masasabi mo sa mga lumalabas na tsismis na hindi ka lang daw drug addict, drug pusher ka pa?"
    Melanie: "They are all liars! Tingnan n'yo nga ako, ang payat-payat ko, I am a model!"
25. On the show, 'Showbiz Stripped': "And the base of my observation is..."
26. When asked where she keeps her beauty pageant crown: "I keep my crown in the voltage."
27. During an interview by the late Inday Badiday:
    Inday: "Paano ka nagsu-survive sa mga trials mo?"
    Melanie: "Alam mo Ate Ludz, you know, when you are alone, you really have to step your foot...ah, forward."
28. On the lovelife of her brother Joey and Kris: "They should talk behind the scenes."
29. During an interview on 'The Buzz', after giving birth: "My answers have been prayered!"
30. "At least original ako, piracy siya."

ALLEGED "MELANISMS":

1. "I couldn't care a damn!"
2. "What's your next class before this?"
3. "Can you repeat that for the second time around once more?"
4. "Hello? My brother Joey is out of town...would you like to wait?"
5. "Don't touch me not!"
6. "You're not a boy anymore! You're a man anymore!"
7. "Hello? For a while...please hang yourself."
8. "You can never can tell."
9. "Why should I have a calling card? I'm not a callgirl!"
10. "Why do you have to tell it at my back...I have a face!"

I am spokeless...

If you have more "Melanisms" to add, let me know...